Getting straight to the point, I bought a pair of faux leather trousers.
I have a feeling they’re going to be either too tight or very, very snug.
So I worked out.
And I may be feeling a little guilty that that was my motivation.
—
My main concern is that the thing that got me out of my nice warm bed was the fact I was so concerned with my body image/size that I felt obligated to work out.
How narcissistic.
I’m so concerned about fitting into a pair of pants that I watched two youtube videos on how to get abs and a thin waist and then made a workout to fit Sarah’s Day workout timer I had bought a year ago.
Does fitting in a pair of jeans mean that much to me?
Apparently.
Maybe it’s a matter of pride. I’m sick of being in between two sizes, so I decided to go down in size. Or maybe, I just want to be smaller than the size I think I may actually be. Though it’s probably the fact, I’ve idolized models and tiny-waisted fashion bloggers for a good few years now, and since I can’t seem to grow another three inches, I’m settling on trying to get my body into an unrealistic shape.
Aren’t we supposed to work out to be healthy? To challenge our bodies? To make sure that if Tom Cruise wants us to be in the next Mission Impossible movie, we’re ready to jump off buildings and film incredible chase scenes?
Ok, that last one might just be me, but it’s still a better reason then what I had.
Or is it?
I still worked out.
It still got me to the gym and onto the treadmill before 45 minutes of abdominal pain, courtesy of my patch-work workout plan (I can still feel the burn as I write this).
And I ate a cupcake.
I’ve wanted to get into a workout routine for well, years now. Am I a little ashamed it came down to the sizing of pants (that haven’t even shipped yet)?
Yeah.
But if I keep up a regime and I start seeing improvement both in my ability and in my physique, will it matter how it started?
No.
So, it’ll come down to balance. It's making sure to push myself in the gym, working on not only my body, but also my form and my limitations throughout my workouts. And I will, hopefully, improve in those areas.
Wish me luck. I’ll let you know how it goes.